.. Suddenly just feel like posting pictures taken on the day before Literature test..











180208.. If only.

Maybe I should deprove, and swing at every balls. I'm currently feeling that I might do ANYTHING to be with Non-Main Team..

Really miss all those friendly matches we had as a TEAM during December holiday last year.. Would laugh like siao with Allisa, Syazana and Jolie.. And would just enjoy and just take in the presence of Wei Shi, Hui Yan and Poh Hian..

Would just enjoy being with you all.. Crap like siao.. All those gossips.. About guys.. Volleyball.. Lots of stuffs.. Would laugh together.. Play ball together.. Me and Wei Shi attempting to spike each other.. And laughing at Hui Yan's overhead spikes.. And would just laugh it off like as if we've got no worries..

At CCK.. Me, Wei Shi and Hui Yan would play 'song bo' game.. Against Poh Hian and Jolie, and occasionally with the other 2 crappers.. Play as in, REALLY play.. Play without any worries..

We held on together, as Non-Main Team.. We would play against Main Team and we would cheer as 'Lai Reserves, Ace!' Allisa as zugong.. Syazana as setter.. Poh Hian as subset.. Hui Yan as our dearest libero.. Jolie center.. Me as hou bai zugong.. I would easily get irritated with Jolie.. And would always snatch Hui Yan's balls..

Syazana would make people laugh.. Hui Yan's balls are emergency case balls.. And Wei Shi would just shoot the second ball over by really swinging hard.. Syazana would spike the second ball.. Allisa and Jolie are super cool..

I really enjoy being with you all.. No words can express my joy and happiness when I'm with you all.. But I didn't realise that the happiness is so shortlived.. I am contented just being Main 8 or 9.. But on 020108..

Everything was just being robbed of me.. Now I'm stuck in the middle.. No more 'song bo'.. No more Non-Main against Main match.. No more laughter.. All gone.. Currently I'm just stuck in the middle..

Maybe I should be grateful, for having a chance being with both sides.. Stuck in the middle, not wanting to move on, still clinging on with the past.. Because the past will not repeat again.. I spent more laughter and happiness with Non-Main.. Not that I don't with the Main.. But somehow, you would want to be where you are comfortable, right? And not, when you see them, dread comes filling in.. That's what I'm experiencing now.. Dread..

No wonder I'm getting more emo and emo training by training.. Maybe I should just let go and not think of Non-Main anymore.. No.. I don't want to let go.. They're all I want.. Sorry..

Now what's left are those fine memories.. They're never going to happen again, but they will be etched in my memory forever no matter what happens..

I'm sorry.. I'm still stuck and undecided.. I know maybe I should look ahead.. Maybe I should..

All these while I'm posting this, tears flowed out like as if it has been wanting to for months.. Crying.. Now I'm empty.. Someone come and flood me with happiness..